My Forever Valentine

Happy Valentines Day, y’all!

I was never one for celebrating this Hallmark holiday. I think the most it ever got was in elementary school when you passed out valentines to your classmates. Even back then, it just didn’t appeal to me.

Now, don’t get me wrong. The concept is great: showering love on those you love. But as I got older I started to think, “shouldn’t you just do that anyways?”

Throughout high school, college, and law school, I didn’t have any long-term boyfriends that would’ve have made this holiday significant. Instead, I showered love on my family.

I love giving gifts and cards, especially to my family. So on Valentine’s Day when I was in college, I would send cards to my whole family.

However, once I started law school, I started focusing on my Forever Valentine: my dad.

To many, your dad is the first man you love. You look up to him, you take after him, and you get inspired by him. And that was no different for me.

If you’ve read any of my previous posts about my dad, you’ll know how close we were, how big of an influence he was on me, and how I miss him like crazy.

My first and second years of law school, I only got a card and gift for my dad, writing “Forever valentine” on the front.

My favorite was the first year because I drew a card that said “Vines are red, meth is blue, happy Valentines Day, I love you!” It also included drawings of red vines, meth, and Heisenberg from Breaking Bad. I made this card because I gave him a pack of red vines (his favorite) and the first season of Breaking Bad.

[What I didn’t anticipate was him showing the card around his office. He said his coworkers would read and say “wait, meth? As in, the drug?” And he would say “yeah, she’s cooking it as a way to pay herself through law school. Doing pretty well too, almost has enough money for all three years.” They’d give him a blank stare and the he’d say “I’m kidding, look at the inside, she gave me Breaking Bad.” So no, nothing to do with drugs over here, haha]

However, my third year was spent with Bret as my Valentine since my dad had passed away a few months before. But I wasn’t in the mood for it back then because of my dad so instead we announced our pregnancy on that day.

But now, we are celebrating Valentines Day for a different reason!

We went to Vegas this past weekend and on our first night my mom, aunt, and my moms friend watched Amelia while we had a date night. We are at Nine Fine Irishmen at New York New York. Then we went up to the top of the Eiffel Tower to watch the Bellagio water show. When we go to the top, Bret proposed!

We are officially engaged and already have been asked if there’s a date. If you say anything to me, please don’t ask if we’ve set a date. Before you think I’m a complete butthead, here’s why: as long as I can remember I’ve had a vision of what I want my wedding to be like. That was shattered when my dad died. If you lost your father as a child or young adult, you may understand this the same way. Since he died, I’ve told Bret I’m not sure I want a wedding anymore. And getting engaged has not changed that.

So while we are very excited to take this next step, we have no idea what we’ll be doing next.


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